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Self & Space
Self & Space
Well we are headed into 2017 with many new changes on the horizon. I wish you the best holiday season ever. Whether your happy or unhappy, healthy or unhealthy please remember to have the best attitude, diet, health regimes and positive relationships you can possibly muster up. When you compare life to a radish, it can be bitter and sweet at the same time. But if you didn't have the bitter you also wouldn't know the sweet, now would you. You
will NEVER get rid of ALL the tumult in your life, but I will offer some things to make it sweeter for 2017. And wow doesn't that year sound ominous 2017!!
Since the New Year is coming many of us have a conscious or unconscious desire to improve ourselves. You may have even written a list
of resolutions. I love the word resolution. Simply, it means to re-solve areas
of our lives that are not working. One of my favorite sayings as a lifestyle coach is "so how is that working for you”? I use that phrase when people ruminate over the negative aspects of their lives, as if talking fervently about their woes somehow solve self and life issues. Rarely does just talking change or transform something that bothers us. It is the action that follows the thought that will change our behavior and our lives. Even cognitive restructuring, a popular therapytechnique, is just a band aid, if a new behavior doesn't
With all the wisdom and ideas I collected throughout
the years, of helping people, I will share a list of my favorites with you. I
will also talk about ideas for improved health, wealth and lifestyle in
Ideas and Thoughts for 2017
If you push you fall.
Take the path of least resistance….it is always easier.
There are rules to relationships, but you and no one else can make them and follow them.
You are living your life like a hamster. You keep going round and round but you are not going anywhere.
We only need air, food, water, shelter, sleep, elimination and sunlight, the seven things that keep us alive. In some cases medication is a need to stay alive, although many choose not to comply with medication and they still live, but not in a healthy way. Anything that keeps us alive is a have to or a need. We either want or don't want to do everything else.
We either want a new beautiful home or we don't want a new beautiful home. Our home is only a need when the elements are going to kill us but a larger, more beautiful home is not a need, its a desire. We want to re-decorate or we don't. Those things are not needs! Watch the difference between have to, need to and or want or don't want to. We don't have to go shopping, clean our homes, care for the people in our lives, or even pay taxes. We either want to or don't want to. If there is something you don't want to do, but doing it would keep you out of trouble,then understand why you will do something that you don't want to do. For instance "I don't want to go to work, but I will since it will benefit my lifestyle and my family". If you find yourself loathing the job, admit that you don't like it, and that will be the first step to change. Admit the
things that are not working for you. After you admit what doesn't work, use
the decision making chart in my previous blog to identify a new coping
strategy to change what does not work.
Go to Therapy and or Get a Life Coach. Two heads are better then one.
Stop blaming others or past situations and stay in the now! The only
person listening to that kind of ranting and raving is you, and it will not
solve anything. We cannot change the past. Your present self, health and your thoughts are the home you live in...it is your consciousness that is your home.
When you are thinking about the past or future you are not in the now.
Grip something tangible, like your wall or table and get fixed on the now and stay
present. The wall is here now! Don't talk to the wall just hold
on until you can get into the present.
My mom's favorite saying "it takes two to tango"...don't know who made it up...but that is the case. If you are having a disagreement with another person, there is a way to resolve it without getting steamed up. Sharing your feelings and validating them can usually settle down a negative situation. If you are having a difficult situation with yourself then there are two aspects of self fighting each other....that is still two! Share your feelings with yourself and validate yourself. EX: I feel misunderstood, bullied, manipulated etc..... but I am a strong and capable person who will compromise.
If you are upset with someone or something and have negative things to say....take that finger and point it towards yourself. Usually if you can see the negative in someone else it is because that trait is in you.
Eat healthy. Look at all the products in your pantry and pull and out and trash anything with corn syrup, chemicals, hydrogenated oils of any kind, ingredients you can't pronounce or identify, products high in salt and or sugar content, products with dye. Use half the amount of oil you usually do, cut back on sweets and foods high in fat content. You can’t believe how much dye is in children’s cereals and cookies. Eat citrus fruit daily, decrease consumption of flesh, and increase intake of vegetables.
Get a healthy water system installed in your home and drink healthy filtered water.
Exercise, even if it is difficult or inconvenient.
Decrease alcohol intake and STOP smoking! Am I starting to get annoying? Oh Well...these are just ideas/thoughts.
If you meet criteria for an addiction http://www.sis.indiana.edu/DSM-IV-Criteria.aspx
Meet with friends and family as much as possible, as long as they are supportive. People closest to you, your support system, usually know you better then you know yourself.
Have some kind of spiritual connection and practice being spiritual regularly in
Have one day per week with only positive thoughts.
Every time you think negatively, on that day, tap yourself on the shoulder and
say “stop”, and resume thinking
Have a wonderful
Marla Stone is a Professional
Her company www.i-deal-lifestyle.com offers
supportive services to families worldwide.
Marla Stone earned her BA in Psychology and a Master's in Social Work and is the founder of I-Deal-Lifestyle, a Self and Space Organization Service.
Serving Orange County, Los Angeles, San Diego and Santa Barbara
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