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Home Preparation Before Selling

4/15/2021

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Beyond Cleaning: Getting Your Home Ready to Sell

People who put their homes on the market are often surprised by how much work it takes to get everything in order and to get their home ready to show. Proper staging is essential for making a positive impression on potential buyers; however, it’s very detailed work and may force you to reassess your home’s condition. It’s easy to assume that everything’s in acceptable condition, only to find out that your realtor believes otherwise.
Houses absorb a lot of wear and tear over the years, and much of it is very noticeable to a discerning home buyer, and that’s the problem. Even things that seem minor to you can leave a buyer with a negative impression. Remember that perception is the reality: A leaky faucet may cause someone to assume that the rest of your home is in poor shape. I-Deal-LIfestyle™ Professional Organizer offers some tips and apps you can use as you determine what needs to be done before letting a potential buyer into your home.
Know Your Worth

Before you start making any big staging moves, be sure you know what’s worth investing in based on your home’s value. It probably doesn’t make sense to spend $2,000 repainting your entire home or freshening up your landscaping if you won’t recoup these costs in the profit from your sale, but you should consider spending money and hiring a team to repair things like replacing window glass or tackling any roofing work.
Before you enlist the help of a real estate agent, you can get a ballpark idea of what houses in your area are going for by downloading apps from Redfin, Trulia, or Zillow, to name a few. These apps allow you to check out listings in your area, which can give you a rough estimate of what you can expect when yourhome finally hits the market.
Good Flow, Lots of Space

A house with plenty of flow and open space is more likely to stand out with buyers who can easily imagine how they might transform it. That means clearing out all the clutter and removing any outdated or excessively large and bulky furniture. Go room by room and organize everything in such a way that you know what’s being thrown away, donated, or placed in storage. Remember that clutter means more than loose piles of papers strewn about or shoes and toys that somehow never get picked up. Extra bookcases, televisions, dressers, cabinets, and loveseats may need to be stored or disposed of to ensure that nothing distracts a potential buyer. Need help with decluttering? I-Deal-LIfestyle™ Professional Organizer can connect you with a local organizer who can help you create order and discard the accumulation of belongings that could be weighing you down.
Deep Clean and Depersonalize

It’s hard to keep a home clean when it may be on the market for months, and keeping it clean is especially important during the COVID-19 pandemic. Consider hiring a cleaning company to make yours look pristine and ready to sell, and continue to keep it clean during the selling process. Opting for freshly-cleaned carpeting can make a home look brand new and get rid of lingering odors. Don’t forget those dark, musty spots that haven’t been cleaned in years, which buyers will surely sniff out. Believe it or not, there are house cleaning apps (Tody, Home Routines, etc.) that can help you out when it’s time to scrub.
Depersonalizing is a crucially important part of staging. It’s how you’ll deemphasize your presence and allow buyers to see themselves as the owners. Many agents advise that your walls should be almost bare, with nothing more than a smattering of generic and non-threatening artwork (i.e. natural landscapes).
The Right Paint
Choosing the right color for your interior walls is an important step in creating a space that’s conducive to prospective buyers. Neutral colors are widely considered the best way to go because they won’t distract visitors the way a rich, luxuriant red or shade of lavender might. Remember, the home you want others to see shouldn’t be a house dominated by your personal tastes; instead, it should be one they can envision as their own. Beige, tan, or shades of gray are considered the best choices by real estate agents. By the same token, slapping on a couple of coats of white paint can be noticeable because it is too bland. A nice mid-range shade is optimal. If you need help, This Old House has a list of apps, including ColorSmart and Paint My Place, that can help when it comes time to select and match the right paint for your home.
Drawing Them In

Giving your property curb appeal is essential for getting people to stop by or make inquiries. You can improve your curb appeal by tidying up your landscaping, planting flowers in a pot by the front door, and making sure the lawn is clear of weeds. Above all, make certain that your house can easily be seen from the street as people drive by, particularly if you have a lot of trees and/or bushes in the front yard. Need some landscaping ideas? Apps such as Houzz and iScape can provide you with some inspiration to make your own yard look great.
Most people expect a lot of cleaning and minor fixes when getting ready to place their homes on the market. But there’s a lot more to staging than vacuuming and dusting. Think of it as transforming your space into someone else’s. With the right approach and a little help from a handful of apps, you can make your home a hot commodity that stands out.

When you’re ready to clear out the clutter for good and to bring organization into your life, look to I-Deal-LIfestyle™ Professional Organizer to connect with a qualified local organizer. And to ensure you make this transformation a lifestyle change, pick up the The Clutter Remedy Book today! Call 949-709-7000 for a free consultation.
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Is Your Child A Target Of Bullying by Marla Stone

3/29/2021

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Learn how to declutter emotions
Is your child a target of bullying?

Many celebrities, Rhianna, Eva Mendes, Justin Timberlake, and Elon Musk, were bully children’s targets. I was also a bullied child. After all, in the years of being a child therapist, I learned Bully's psychology. I realize that bullies are children of neglectful parenting.

Latch-Key kids are not cared for properly, without unconditional love and regard, and so they seek comfort in other neglected children and often “run in packs.” The Latch-Key kids stick together and quickly snuff out the well-cared-for kids. The neglected kids' pick on the well-groomed kids, who have their lunches and go home to parents that teach them about right from wrong.

The downtrodden, unloved bunch of kids or a single bully are filled with apathy which is a combination of feeling unloved and seething with jealousy. Bully kids hide their bullying ways at home and are usually picked on either by the parents and or siblings.

Many adults who report bully victimization as children end up with low self-esteem, yet over time can become hugely successful, confident, and very humanitarian types of people, while bullies generally fall short in life and self-defeated.

Marla Stone, MSW, Life and Space Organizer www.i-deal-lifestyle.com
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The World's Best Organizer

2/27/2021

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From San Diego to Boston,and Paris to Pakistan why is Marla Stone the best organizer in the world? Simple, it's her background in mental health, design and feng shui. Her professional organizers skills and team building strategies, plus her comprehensive book on getting organized leaves her leading the pack of so-called organizers that tout the trade. When you want clutter no more, you will come knocking on the door of the organizing expertise of Marla's company http://www.i-deal-lifestyle.com. Learning how to declutter is one thing and living an ideal lifestyle is another. Stone says "the combination of a decluttered life, and a decluttered emotional body is the secret to a most profound living experience."  Is it really about clutter when it comes to your unhappiness or is it the unhappiness creating the clutter? Marla has elevated the understanding of clutter to the point her clients will live clutter-free forever.

Marla loves to work with feng shui principles, bagua space planning, furniture placement, and interior design, along with the simple ideas of the most efficient decluttering strategies she created. Her categorizing and fine-tuned home and business organizational systems have revolutionized the professional organizing industry, and cut industry time standards to finish a project in half.

Stone's feng shui books free download makes organizing more fun and helps you identify what objects are useful, purposeful, loved and sentimental. Marla explains that "objects hold energy and when they are properly placed it creates good versus negative energy."  You may poo poo Feng Shui, yet numerous movie stars and large corporations never go without Feng Shui design when designing their space, and the C-Level positioning within the floor-plan. So for the best free feng shui pdf, we recommend that you check it out.

Stone resides in Orange County, California and travels world-wide helping people strategize and implement better organized living and workplaces. 
She will also put you on a clutter diet when you have over-accumulated in order to live the organized lifestyle you dream about.

Here's the link to learn more about Marla and I-Deal-Lifestyle Inc 

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Organization Tips for Those on a Tight Schedule By Marla Stone

2/12/2021

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Organization Tips for Those on a Tight Schedule

For many of you staying organized is taxing, and desirable all at the same time. There are so many areas of your life to maintain with only so much time in a day. For those of you on a tight schedule, this task will feel overwhelming, at times. Perhaps you’re a busy parent shuffling your kids to and from school and activities. It could be that you work several jobs to make ends meet. By the end of the work day you don’t have the time or energy to get organized. Regardless of your situation, there are several ways in which you will keep life decluttered and organized in a cinch.

Below, I will shed light on a few of the strategies that I know will help keep you organized, and productive daily, weekly, and monthly. Keep reading to learn more!

Establish a Morning Routine

You can expect to remain organized throughout the day when you plan and organize your time in the morning. Establishing a morning routine is important for many reasons. A regular routine improves your emotional and physical wellbeing, and helps you function better in the workplace. Next, start your day in a positive way. A positive morning mind creates clarity and uplifting moments throughout the rest of your day.


Create a morning routine, by making small changes at first. For example, make your bed, open up your curtains to let the light in, and lay out your next day’s clothes. Begin with little things you can do to get your day started on a happy note.

Once you’ve made a habit of doing the little things, you can begin layering in more organization-focused tasks; doing a load of laundry, watering plants, or emptying the dishwasher each morning. Include these tasks in your morning routine, and it will help free up some of your time later in the day or after work.


These new morning tasks allow you to feel less stressed each evening, and allows you to do something you enjoy such as sitting down to a nice dinner or reading a few chapters of a book. Accomplishing a morning routine of quick chores relieves the build up of larger daunting household chores.

Stock Up on Essentials

Another great way to remain organized is to keep the essential items you use on a daily basis, on hand at all times. Items such as dish soap, paper towels, and laundry detergent can all be purchased in bulk and stored in your garage or extra pantry space you create. Keeping extra items on hand will eliminate running out to the grocery store every time an essential product runs low. In the event that you forget to stock up when you make your weekly or monthly trip to the store, with just a few simple steps you can get those much desired home essentials delivered right to you. Whether it’s paper products, pet supplies, or lunch box staples, staying stocked up will save you time and give you more peace and leisure time.


Organize An Optimal Pantry


Another time saver is to learn how to keep your pantry forever organized. Once you have your pantry stock items, a simple way to keep everything categorized and contained takes a minimal amount of time and energy. To learn more about how to optimize your pantry space, and keep it organized long-term order the book, The Clutter Remedy. There is entire section of the book devoted to planning and setting up a luxury style pantry for very little cost, and with much success.

Purge Clutter

While it’s important to stock up on everyday essentials and save time on trips to the store, it’s equally important to purge often in order to avoid an excessive amount of clutter. When you continue to pile new items on top of old, you create clutter clusters. To avoid a big mess, there are several things you can do. For starters, you can refuse to allow it into your home. That’s correct, you have control over the clutter that makes its way into your space. Clutter is a silent time waster and it does not always announce it’s arrival. It’s sneaky that way. Be conscious of what “things” you allow into your spaces and you’ll have a better handle on avoiding build up, which in turn will save you time!

A form of an unwelcome clutter guest can take shape in your daily mail. Allowing the mail to pile up rather than opening it upon arrival, deciding whether it’s important or not, then discarding it or filing it away, in the appropriate destination is a daily routine that will take seconds when done immediately. Ignoring mail and letting it pile up for periods of time becomes overwhelming. Rifling through piles leads to a chaotic feeling, and often regret.


A great solution for paying bills on time is to have them sent to you, electronically. E-bills help the environment and gives you more time for fun. Also, opening up paper bills is tedious, especially when they’ve piled up. Bonus: you will also be able to see your kitchen table and your countertop!

With The Clutter Remedy strategies it’s easy to determine exactly where to begin when it comes to organizing your space. It’s simple to determine how to organize your self and your stuff with tips in this great book, or audio recording. Also, all the tips I’ve shared are just starting points and serve as a loose guide for strategies to test out when you’re starting a new and exciting organizational plan that fits your unique schedule. With a little effort and daily upkeep you will achieve your organizational goals. Once you’ve tackled decluttering your space, check out one of my past blog posts on tips for decluttering your life.
Declutter Your Strategy Expert
Marla Stone, Professional Organizer l The Clutter Remedy Expert



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Self Care Is Time Well Spent

2/3/2021

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Coming into a new year is the perfect time to reevaluate certain aspects of your lifestyle and determine ways to better yourself. Last year most likely brought about a significant amount of change to your day-to-day lifestyle, which is why it is so important to put your health first and keep your finances in check. Here are a few ways you can protect both your health and your wealth in 2021.

Protect Your Health:
Mental, emotional, and physical health are so important because they make us who we are. Make it a priority to care for all aspects of your health to ensure that you are operating at your highest level.

1. Prioritize Routine Care

Prioritizing routine care is not only beneficial for your physical health but your mental wellbeing as well. By ensuring that you are up to date on your doctor and dental visits, you are making a cognizant effort to catch any small problems before they escalate, providing you with added peace of mind. While you can put off routine visits due to the pandemic, check with your individual provider to see if they have telehealth appointments available to virtually discuss any concerns you may have.

Be sure you are not only visiting the doctor regularly but also implementing preventive health measures into your everyday life. You can take preventative measures by working out (walking for 20 minutes a day), staying hydrated, and eating healthier foods in order to keep your mental and physical health on track.

2. Declutter

Decluttering your life has a huge impact on your emotional wellbeing, which then trickles down to your physical wellbeing. If you are living in a messy space, it is more likely that your mind will feel disorganized as well. It is important to reside in an orderly space to maintain emotional and mental wellbeing. Decluttering your living environment helps reduce stress and anxiety while promoting a sense of accomplishment. Many of us have a significant amount of stuff but we have no idea what to do with it and we don’t want to throw it out for one reason or another. There are many different resources available to provide you with tips and tricks on how to organize your space and make it feel less overwhelming.

3. Continue Working on Yourself

There is always room for improvement and as humans, we are constantly changing, growing, and evolving. More so, it is so important to be self-aware and realize that there is always room for growth. Personal development can have a huge impact on your mental health and overall wellbeing because it allows you to reach your fullest potential while understanding yourself on a deeper level. Whether this is through strengthening relationships, inner self-exploration, or understanding how to accept change, these are huge strides that can help you to be your best self.

Protect Your Wealth:
4. Re-evaluate Your Investments

Ever since the pandemic hit, the financial landscape has changed dramatically. Due to this change, it is important to re-evaluate investments you may have such as index funds, stocks, and your 401k. In the new year, take some time to reconsider your current investment strategy while also setting some financial goals for yourself. One of those goals could be to determine how you want to allocate your disposable income differently such as increasing your 401K contributions or finding ways to earn passive income.

5. Protect Your Assets

One key way to protect your assets is to ensure you have adequate insurance coverage. Even though insurance could be viewed as an extra expense, it is important to understand that insurance protects your finances in the event of an unexpected circumstance. Having the correct coverage keeps your most important assets safe while protecting you from financial hardship and legal challenges. For example, purchasing a life insurance policy is especially important when you own a business or have dependants This is because life insurance financially protects your business and/or your loved ones if you were to pass away.

Moreover, if you are a homeowner, you most likely have a homeowners’ insurance policy already. However, one consideration going into the new year is to look into your current possessions and determine if they would adequately be covered under your policy. For example, higher-priced items you own such as wedding rings, art, or antiques, might not be covered by your current homeowners’ policy so you want to look into a special insurance policy, also known as a “scheduled policy” to protect these items.

6. Save Regularly

One of the best ways to protect your wealth is by building up your savings. Having an emergency fund readily available in the event of an unexpected occurrence could help save you financially in the long run. If you were to suffer from job loss or be faced with a large, unanticipated cost, you will have the funds readily available as opposed to having to use credit cards, take out a loan, or borrow money from someone you know. As a rule of thumb, it is best to have enough money saved up to pay for 3-6 months of your living expenses. This will allow you to make other arrangements, find a new job, or pay a bill in order to get back on track.

Protecting both your health and your wealth is one of the ways you will become the version of yourself that you’ve always wanted to be. By taking small but impactful steps, you will ensure your long-term health and wealth goals are accomplished.

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Organizing Your Home With Feng Shui by Marla Stone

1/5/2021

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Do you ever feel so bogged down that you don't want to do anything? Have you become frustrated with how you are living day-to-day? Do you have laundry, papers, dishes, clothing, and tons of stuff piling up? How about your garage and closets? Do you know what's in there? Well, you are not alone. Many people that I help are overwhelmed with responsibility, children, loss, caretaking, work, and life in general. Many people live lives of quiet desperation just waiting for that "adult nanny" to walk in and save the day. I-Deal-Lifestyle offers you that wonderful "adult nanny" type of service every day of the week. I-Deal-Lifestyle also offers personal shopping, Feng Shui, Decor Solutions, Life Coaching, office and paperwork assistance, and much, much more. We love helping people with their self and space, clearing a path for more joy, wellness, and clarity. We teach you easy and efficient ways to keep your area organized long-term.

You want to know when enough is enough and get someone to help you sort through all of the things that are clogging your lifestyle. I-Deal-Lifestyle has the expertise to organize every aspect of your self, your life, and your space. We manage every room in your home, including home offices and children zones. We do it with zest, talent, warmth, and concern for detail so that you will feel intense relief even with one visit.

Using Feng Shui as a template for organizing makes it interesting and puts some structure and zing into effect. I-Deal-Lifestyle, Professional Organizers will even Feng Shui your bookcases, built-ins, and your desk. Feng Shui, an ancient artistic practice of placing objects in your home. It is a unique way to create balance and harmony, wellness, prosperity, romance, friendships, family harmony, health, creativity, and wisdom. If you don't think it is real, Marla Stone owner of I-Deal-Lifestyle, and author of The Clutter Remedy will tell you it is since she sees how people naturally actually Feng Shui without knowing it exists. Her expertise in moving furniture around and placing your decor in unique places immediately affects the occupants of the home or office.

A Feng Shui Template divides your home into nine separate but equal areas. These sections are called Bagua’s. When your your home and office are a perfect rectangular shape your Bagua areas are evident. When your spaces are not an ideal rectangular shape, then you have "missing" parts that can be enhanced to maintain balance and harmony.

Each Bagua area is associated with specific colors, shapes, and elements. Feng Shui is a learned skill, and you can grasp it with a lot of training and education. It is a fun way of decorating and organizing yourself and your space. So get Feng Shui'd, organized, and breathe some vitality and life into your self & space.
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To learn more about how you can Feng Shui your space read Marla Stone’s book on Feng Shui here https://www.i-deal-lifestyle.com/free-feng-shui-e-book.html

Call I-Deal-Lifestyle for a free 30-minute consultation and GET ORGANIZED NOW!
949-709-7000. Or email and set up an appointment for an assessment to get started!
Info@i-deal-lifestyle.com
Professional Organizer, Orange County, Los Angeles County, San Diego County
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Health Challeges That Mess You Up

1/4/2021

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Health Challenges That Mess up Your Life and Space By Marla Stone

Mental, Emotional, Physical Wellness versus Mental, Emotional, Physical Illness is a positive way to talk about Mental Health Challenges. I also like to talk about the difference between mental health vs. emotional health vs. physical health because they all work together. Vibrant Health is all about inner feelings, feeling balanced and whole, being happy and satisfied with life, and having a good mood. Mental Health is all about how your mind, thoughts, and cognitive processes are working. Physical Health is all about how your body is operating and staying healthy and balanced.

The separation of Mental, Emotional illness vs. Physical illness has always confused me. Why are brain (mental health/emotional issues and physical health issues split into two categories? The answers are in psychiatry, which started in the 1800s and asserted that it was the "medical" treatment for "the mind." Why didn't medical treatment for the whole person, mind, body, and spirit ensue? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychiatry. Isn't your brain and your emotional self part of your body? I would think so.

At some point in the early 1800's when Psychiatry, a new field started, anything to do with depression, psychosis, "odd or strange" behavior, personality traits, and communications started to fall under Psychiatry instead of going to the old family doctor. Many of these "odd or strange" behaviors come from Medical issues, childhood issues, trauma. Yet, the person would be dealt with by a Mental Health Specialist or Psychiatrist versus a "regular doctor."

That is when stigma increased, and terms like "nervous breakdown," "crazy," "mental patient," and any other negative connotations about mental health challenges started growing and upsetting the actual care necessary for mental health. The other problem with the separation between medical and mental health care is that many mental and emotional health challenges have organic and medical causes. That often was overlooked by Psychiatrists who wanted to find a dynamic and or personal weakness as the cause.

Many people can die from having a Psychiatric diagnosis take over their treatment when the mental and emotional health issues originate from a physical disorder.

The ideal situation if one is having mental/emotional health issues is to have a Psychiatrist and a Physical Health Practitioner on one team. Often there is NO communication between the two disciplines causing lengthy and unsuccessful results.

Most people, though, who suffer from emotional, mental, and or physical health challenges, may become disorganized and have difficulty with motivation to clean and keep things organized. Emotional illness comes from having the mental state disrupted. Emotional illness can be from having physical condition disrupted. Sometimes mental and physical disruption is happening all at once, and then your self and space will be tremendously affected. Finding a team approach to help you get back to WELLNESS may help put you back on track and the fast train to recovery.

Looking at old memories of hurt and pain, facing them and talking to a Licensed Therapist, examing your diet, exercise, addressing physical health issues, staying on a good medical/mental health regimen, and pulling all of your support and resources together is essential to recovery.

Finding out the source of why there is an emotional factor (hostile and harsh feelings) would be the first step in addressing any self or space imbalance. Once you find out the source, then the treatment can be organized so you can get organized and resume a balanced self and space.

If you are experiencing any mental, emotional, and or physical issues, and you realize you want or require help, contact your insurance carrier and or any community resources in your area to address these issues immediately. You may want to get a mental health consultant and or coach for guidance and resource coordination. Waiting to focus on your mental and medical health issues may only extend the suffering of yourself and your space.
www.i-deal-lifestyle.com


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Stay Motivated by Marla Stone

1/4/2021

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We are in the midst of winter and the aftermath of the holidays. The #newyear2021 is upon us. How are you going to get the energy to get the #holidaydecorations cleaned up and put away? The magic word is motivation.

How will you muster up this vitality and stay encouraged? Many words describing the opposite of motivated are aimless, meaningless, unplanned, vague, dissuaded, suppressed, halted, prevented, depressed, dejected, discouraged, disheartened, cast down, lazy, dull, and sluggish. So to not end up, at the very least, lazy, lethargic, averting a slow-moving and #tumblingsnowball of a Winter, here are some tips for staying with-it and happy during #winterseason2021


Tips for Getting and #StayingMotivated


Boost Exercise.


Talk To yourself in the mirror and smile at yourself too. Seriously it works great when you say positive things and give yourself a big smile every day.

Cut back on fatty foods: dairy, meat, oil. Increase veggies, fruit, and lean protein.

Sleep well, and if you don't sleep well, find out why and fix it with herbal sleep products, don't eat 3 hours before bed, don't overstimulate yourself before bed with too much exercise or scary movies or your cell phone, get a fixed sleep schedule, see your doctor.

#Copingstrategies are any behaviors, thoughts, or actions which will decrease anger and or sadness. Each person has different coping strategies for lifting themselves out of the dumps or moving them away from becoming a self-sabotaging terrorist. You know what your coping strategies are! And if you don't, here are a few to contemplate.

Socialize (get on www.meetup.com) and find a group. Book club and or charity you would enjoy.

Read books on how to stay motivated.

The top two triggers for a mood outburst, whether in the anger and sadness category, are family and holidays. Recognizing those two things are are catalysts for being miserable and unmotivated will prepare you to introduce adaptive coping strategies.


  • Sing or listen to great music
  • Hang out with Pals
  • Walk on the beach
  • Walk-in nature
  • Get Romantic (light some scented candles and pick wildflowers)
  • Go Kayaking
  • Karaoke
  • Try a new type of healthy food
  • Kiss yourself wherever you can reach (usually your arms or hands)
  • Listen to your heart and all its desires and fulfill them


Marla Stone, MSW, Author l Keynote Speaker l Professional Organizer l Productivity Expert l Decor and Feng Shui Idealist
www.i-deal-lifestyle.com
info@i-deal-lifestyle.com



















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Tips for #2021 by Marla Stone

12/21/2020

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Lots of Tips and Suggestions From Life Organizer Marla Stone, MSW for 2021


  • Shop Green, and recycle. It is better for the planet. You can find most of what you want in Thrift Stores, consignment or on-line sales groups.
  • Sell, drop off or barter with the stuff you don’t want.
  • It is better to give than receive. Don’t forget that.
  • Go to Therapy and or Get a Life Coach. Two heads are better than one head.
  • Stop blaming others or past situations and stay in the NOW, and the KNOW
  • You cannot change the past, but you can heal it.
  • Your present self, health, and thoughts are the home where you live. It is your consciousness that is your home.
  • Get organized; it will not only clear your space; it will clear your mind. Mind Clutter is a vicious cycle. Cluttered mind, cluttered space, cluttered mind, cluttered space.
  • Get along better with yourself and you will see magic form in all of your relationships
  • If you disagree with another person, there is a way to resolve it without getting steamed up. Sharing your feelings and validating the other person for their feelings will settle down a negative situation.
  • If you have a difficult problem with yourself, there are traditionally two opposing aspects of creating self fighting. Realize fighting with yourself is futile.
  • Share your feelings with yourself and validate yourself. EX: I feel misunderstood, bullied, manipulated, and I am a strong and capable person who will compromise and be flexible.
  • If you are upset with someone or something and have negative things to say, take that finger and point it towards yourself. Usually, if you can see the negative in someone else, it is because that trait is in you
  • Check yourself to see if you meet criteria for a personality disorder
  • http://www.depression-guide.com/personality-disorders.htm
  • Eat healthily. Look at all the products in your pantry and pull and out and trash anything with corn syrup, chemicals, hydrogenated oils of any kind, and ingredients you can’t pronounce.
  • Identify, products high in salt, and sugar content, products with food dye. You can’t believe how much dye is in children’s cereals and cookies.
  • Eat citrus fruit daily, decrease consumption of flesh, and increase intake of vegetables.
  • Get a healthy water system installed in your home and drink healthy filtered water. Remember, skinny does not always mean healthy. Being overweight, though, is not healthy
  • Exercise, even if it is difficult or inconvenient
  • Decrease alcohol intake and smoking or work on eliminating addiction challenges.
  • Check and see if you meet the criteria for an addiction http://www.sis.indiana.edu/DSM-IV-Criteria.aspx
  • Meet with friends and family as much as possible, as long as they are supportive. People closest to you, your support system, usually know you better than you know yourself. If you are isolating, get a mental health checkup.
  • Identify toxic people who put you down, create chaos, and who have issues with greed, vanity, anger, lust, or unhealthy boundaries.
  • Have some spiritual connection, and practice being spiritual regularly in life. If you are confused about your belief system, talk it out with someone until you get it straight. Being uncertain about whether there is a God and or a Higher Power is like living in limbo. Until you get some clear ideas about why and how we are here on this planet, living in a body, you will unlikely be clear about anything else.
  • Have one day per week with only positive thoughts. Every time you think negatively, tap yourself on the shoulder and say “stop,” and resume thinking positively by replacing the negative thought with an opposite positive thought. So if you say to yourself, “oh, I’m so stupid,” replace it with “I’m a super smart and capable person”. You will be amazed at how negative self-talk can bring down your ego system, causing anxiety and hostility towards self and others, and how positive self-talk will raise your self-esteem.


Have an excellent 2021


Marla Stone, MSW is a Professional Organizer/Lifestyle
Coach, Decor, and Feng Shui Specialist.
www.i-deal-lifestyle.com
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Transitioning Gracefully Into 2021 by Marla Stone, MSW

12/21/2020

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Okay, well, it looks like you will make it into 2021 with or without a “hitch.” If you compare life to a pomegranate seed, it can be bitter and sweet at the same time. But if you didn’t have the bitter, you also wouldn’t know the sweet, now would you. You can NEVER get rid of ALL the chaos in your life, but I will offer some things to make it sweeter for 2021. 

Since it is a New Year, most of us have a conscious or unconscious desire to improve ourselves. You may have even written a list of resolutions. I love the word resolution. Simply, it means to re-solve areas of our lives that are not working. 

One of my favorite sayings as a former psychotherapist was, “So how is that working for you”? I used that phrase when people would go over and over the negative aspects of their lives, as if talking fervently about their woes would somehow solve self and life issues. Rarely does just talking change or transform something that bothers us. It is the action that follows the thought that will change behavior and lives. Even cognitive restructuring, a popular therapy technique, is just a band-aid if a new activity doesn’t occur. So definitely write out the list of things you wanted to accomplish in January 2021, not only something you want to change but what you genuinely want to see manifest in your life.

With all the wisdom and ideas I collected throughout the years, I will share a list of my favorites with you. I will also talk about ideas for improved health, wealth, and lifestyle in this article.

Ideas and Thoughts for
2021

  • When you push, you fall. Take the path of least resistance to meet your goals
  • Work on relationships that will be fruitful, supportive, and kind 
  • Mend damaged relationships that are worthy
  • Eliminate toxic relationships with people who will not change.
  • Become more organized in a long-term way
  • Eat healthier food
  • Become more homeopathic and naturopathic in healing illnesses.
  • Create a happy you
  • Be more positive. The Glass is overflowing instead of empty
  • Design something beautiful in your home or office
  • Get caught up on paperwork
  • Figure out a system for incoming mail and papers
  • Exercise every day
  • Be innovative in your approach to friends and colleagues
  • Improve communication skills
  • Be a better lover of your self and your partner, friends, and family
  • There are rules to relationships. Make them and enforce them

People change when people want to change or perhaps “see the light.” 

You could wait a whole lifetime for a person “to change,” but it doesn’t mean they will. You could wait for your entire life to change yourself, but you only change when something changes.

It takes WILL to change! Most people who are “toxic” are usually in the mindset that they are entitled and perfect, and therefore they do not believe that change is necessary. Toxic people may not have the will to “see the light” since it would be overwhelming to realize how much time and effort it would take to change their ways. The type of person that thinks of self first puts self first is called a “frenemy.” Often they do not see their demise. They wonder why things do not work out for themselves, blaming others for their life blunders.

Living like a hamster in a wheel, going round and round is a crazy-making process. You end up going nowhere. Get out of your rut and groove and change it up. Stop the wheel, get off, create goals, and work on achieving them.

Admit what doesn’t work for you in 2021 by using the decision making
chart in my previous blog to identify a new coping strategy
to change what does not work. Decision-Making Chart http://www.i-deal-lifestyle.com/1/post/2011/10/how-to-make-difficult-decisions-by-marla-stone.html

Have a wonderful and safe and happy and healthy holiday season and happy new year!
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    Marla is known as the Declutter Your Strategy™ expert. Marla earned her BA in Psychology and a Master's in Social Work and is the founder of
    ​I-Deal-Lifestyle Inc., A Strategy Improvement Company. Services include Decluttering, Training & Development and Coaching. Marla is also the Author of The Clutter Remedy: A Guide To Getting Organized For Those Who Love Their Stuff

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