Do you ever feel so bogged down that you don't want to do anything? Have you become frustrated with how you are living day-to-day? Do you have laundry, papers, dishes, clothing, and tons of stuff piling up? How about your garage and closets? Do you know what's in there? Well, you are not alone. Many people that I help are overwhelmed with responsibility, children, loss, caretaking, work, and life in general. Many people live lives of quiet desperation just waiting for that "adult nanny" to walk in and save the day. I-Deal-Lifestyle offers you that wonderful "adult nanny" type of service every day of the week. I-Deal-Lifestyle also offers personal shopping, Feng Shui, Decor Solutions, Life Coaching, office and paperwork assistance, and much, much more. We love helping people with their self and space, clearing a path for more joy, wellness, and clarity. We teach you easy and efficient ways to keep your area organized long-term.

You want to know when enough is enough and get someone to help you sort through all of the things that are clogging your lifestyle. I-Deal-Lifestyle has the expertise to organize every aspect of your self, your life, and your space. We manage every room in your home, including home offices and children zones. We do it with zest, talent, warmth, and concern for detail so that you will feel intense relief even with one visit.

Using Feng Shui as a template for organizing makes it interesting and puts some structure and zing into effect. I-Deal-Lifestyle, Professional Organizers will even Feng Shui your bookcases, built-ins, and your desk. Feng Shui, an ancient artistic practice of placing objects in your home. It is a unique way to create balance and harmony, wellness, prosperity, romance, friendships, family harmony, health, creativity, and wisdom. If you don't think it is real, Marla Stone owner of I-Deal-Lifestyle, and author of The Clutter Remedy will tell you it is since she sees how people naturally actually Feng Shui without knowing it exists. Her expertise in moving furniture around and placing your decor in unique places immediately affects the occupants of the home or office.

A Feng Shui Template divides your home into nine separate but equal areas. These sections are called Bagua’s. When your your home and office are a perfect rectangular shape your Bagua areas are evident. When your spaces are not an ideal rectangular shape, then you have "missing" parts that can be enhanced to maintain balance and harmony.

Each Bagua area is associated with specific colors, shapes, and elements. Feng Shui is a learned skill, and you can grasp it with a lot of training and education. It is a fun way of decorating and organizing yourself and your space. So get Feng Shui'd, organized, and breathe some vitality and life into your self & space.
​
To learn more about how you can Feng Shui your space read Marla Stone’s book on Feng Shui here https://www.i-deal-lifestyle.com/free-feng-shui-e-book.html

Call I-Deal-Lifestyle for a free 30-minute consultation and GET ORGANIZED NOW!
949-709-7000. Or email and set up an appointment for an assessment to get started!
Info@i-deal-lifestyle.com
Professional Organizer, Orange County, Los Angeles County, San Diego County

Okay, well, it looks like you will make it into 2021 with or without a “hitch.” If you compare life to a pomegranate seed, it can be bitter and sweet at the same time. But if you didn’t have the bitter, you also wouldn’t know the sweet, now would you. You can NEVER get rid of ALL the chaos in your life, but I will offer some things to make it sweeter for 2021. 

Since it is a New Year, most of us have a conscious or unconscious desire to improve ourselves. You may have even written a list of resolutions. I love the word resolution. Simply, it means to re-solve areas of our lives that are not working. 

One of my favorite sayings as a former psychotherapist was, “So how is that working for you”? I used that phrase when people would go over and over the negative aspects of their lives, as if talking fervently about their woes would somehow solve self and life issues. Rarely does just talking change or transform something that bothers us. It is the action that follows the thought that will change behavior and lives. Even cognitive restructuring, a popular therapy technique, is just a band-aid if a new activity doesn’t occur. So definitely write out the list of things you wanted to accomplish in January 2021, not only something you want to change but what you genuinely want to see manifest in your life.

With all the wisdom and ideas I collected throughout the years, I will share a list of my favorites with you. I will also talk about ideas for improved health, wealth, and lifestyle in this article.

Ideas and Thoughts for
2021

• When you push, you fall. Take the path of least resistance to meet your goals
• Work on relationships that will be fruitful, supportive, and kind 
• Mend damaged relationships that are worthy
• Eliminate toxic relationships with people who will not change.
• Become more organized in a long-term way
• Eat healthier food
• Become more homeopathic and naturopathic in healing illnesses.
• Create a happy you
• Be more positive. The Glass is overflowing instead of empty
• Design something beautiful in your home or office
• Get caught up on paperwork
• Figure out a system for incoming mail and papers
• Exercise every day
• Be innovative in your approach to friends and colleagues
• Improve communication skills
• Be a better lover of your self and your partner, friends, and family
• There are rules to relationships. Make them and enforce them

People change when people want to change or perhaps “see the light.” 
You could wait a whole lifetime for a person “to change,” but it doesn’t mean they will. You could wait for your entire life to change yourself, but you only change when something changes.

It takes WILL to change! Most people who are “toxic” are usually in the mindset that they are entitled and perfect, and therefore they do not believe that change is necessary. Toxic people may not have the will to “see the light” since it would be overwhelming to realize how much time and effort it would take to change their ways. The type of person that thinks of self first puts self first is called a “frenemy.” Often they do not see their demise. They wonder why things do not work out for themselves, blaming others for their life blunders.

Living like a hamster in a wheel, going round and round is a crazy-making process. You end up going nowhere. Get out of your rut and groove and change it up. Stop the wheel, get off, create goals, and work on achieving them.

Admit what doesn’t work for you in 2021 by using the decision making
chart in my previous blog to identify a new coping strategy
to change what does not work. Decision-Making Chart http://www.i-deal-lifestyle.com/1/post/2011/10/how-to-make-difficult-decisions-by-marla-stone.html

Have a wonderful and safe and happy and healthy holiday season and happy new year!

There may never be a perfect time for decluttering your home’s environment as it is usually time-consuming and can often be stressful. Although considering that we encounter many obstacles and changes throughout our lives, this often encourages improvement. 

Over time, it seems easier to forget about our items building up as we put them in storage and set them aside in our rooms. The activity of decluttering doesn’t have to be a time-consuming chore. Make it a rewarding experience as you move into your beautiful new home by gifting and donating belongings you don’t need as well as simply tossing items of no value. 

Whether you’re someone who’s lost track of organizing their things, have a hobby of collecting, or even someone who just loves all their stuff, there are helpful ways to help you live a more balanced life. Keep possible emotional, physical, and psychological effects in mind as you take the steps to finish decluttering before moving. Being aware of any of these aspects and working through them will undoubtedly help you reach a refreshed lifestyle. 

Unpacking in Your New Home
Before you move, you’ll want to take the time to decide what you actually want to unpack into your new, open spaces. This is the best time to remove all forgotten and unused items from your old lifestyle before they enter your new one. 

When you begin, ask yourself what each item’s worth is to you and your health. Don’t think twice about certain things such as food storage containers without lids, expired foods, or damaged items that cannot be repaired. If these things cannot be repurposed, then put them in the trash without worrying about it anymore. 

For some friendly and supportive advice, you can use specific techniques in The Clutter Remedy: A Guide To Getting Organized For Those Who Love Their Stuff by Marla Stone, MSW to help you make good decisions about what to pack up and move. This book will even guide you through organizing what you have and want to keep to create functional spaces you’ll love wherever you are. 

Minimize Stress 
Avoid overthinking about different kinds of decluttering strategies; there is no “right” strategy to start. To easily keep track of everything, you can organize items by category. If they hold true sentimental value and bring happiness, keep them. Otherwise, you can then decide how you want to get rid of the items.

Make the process less stressful by taking breaks as well as asking for help from your friends, family members, and our residential declutter services to assist you. We can help with a wide variety of focuses in regards to sorting, creating space, selling items, recycling, and even our handyman services. Our goal is to guide you in practical ways to your ideal lifestyle by becoming free of clutter and disorder while promoting emotional freedom. The situation of decluttering and moving can cause you to forget about some of the other things going on in life, but there are many resources here to help you succeed. 

It’s important to stay conscious of your budget, especially if you’re moving around a holiday. Balancing costs such as moving services, professional cleanings, repairs, and upcoming bills can easily add up if you’re not paying close attention and easily strain your financial situation. Consider looking into a fixed-rate low interest loan, such as a home equity loan, on your current home to help cover these expenses. A home equity loan doesn’t have any requirements as to how you use them, so long as you pay them back within the timeframe of the loan. A loan like that can drastically lower the financial and emotional stress of moving, giving you less worries of the risk of falling into debt.

Recycle, Repurpose, and Donate to Charity
Rather than feeling guilty about throwing your items away, consider repurposing, donating to charity, and simply recycling or even upcycling. This way you can feel much less guilt about how much stuff you throw away and don’t have to worry about it sitting in a landfill somewhere.

If you have nice clothing, jewelry, home decor, antiques, books, DVDs, CDs, collections, and working electronics or appliances that you just don’t use anymore, this can be a perfect opportunity to gift them away, or simply give them away to friends and family. You can also consider donating items similar to these to charity. There are still many organizations accepting a variety of donations during this time including the Salvation Army, Goodwill, MedSupplyDrive, the Humane Society, Feeding America, and even more. 

Recycling certain things can support a great cause and help the Earth’s sustainability. Recycling benefits the environment in a number of ways and going green can be inspiring to practice. Learn about what common household items you can recycle and how so that you can start removing it all from your spaces more efficiently. 

Sell & Downsize
Before getting set up in your new home with your new, refreshed lifestyle, make sure the only large items that you take with you are practical. Furniture frequently falls into this category, and if you have a big couch or too many chairs, ask yourself how often these will all be used, or if all of it will fit in your new house. If you don’t live with many people and don’t have visitors over often, or if you have smaller spaces, then this is your opportunity to downsize items like these. 

The online marketplace can sometimes be discouraging during the selling process, but you can still get lucky and find someone willing to make the trade. Place your furniture or other big home items for sale online with Craigslist, Facebook groups, or other websites where you can meet with locals. You can even have a garage sale for a possibly quicker sale of everything within a few days. 

When you downsize and purchase more fitting furniture for your new home, don’t get lost in large retail company deals and upsells. This can risk going over your budget and hurting your credit score. Instead, purchase furniture and decor locally from online groups, consignment, and thrift shops. Plus, scoring a secondhand gem for a fraction of its original cost is a motivating feeling.

Get Started on Decluttering Your Lifestyle Now
Once you’re finally done, you can even take practices you’ve learned to the next level by applying home style trends like Feng Shui, which will continue to help you keep your home life balanced. This particular focus is said to improve aspects of your life, such as wealth, fame, recognition, love and relationships, family harmony, good health, creativity, skills, and knowledge. Soon enough, you’ll find yourself adapting home trends to continue balancing your lifestyle. 

Whether your move is happening soon or not for a long time, it’s never too early to start decluttering now. In addition, decluttering helps your home make a strong first impression which makes the selling process easy for buyers. Focus on living more with less stuff, and how you can continue to maintain it. By doing so, not only are you organizing and crafting optimal surroundings, but you are also learning more about yourself and your own values to fully create your ideal lifestyle. 
​

Many organizers show up in every part of the country, wanting to get into your sock drawer and organize your pants, shoes, office, makeup, kitchen, kids toys, garage, and your life? Yet, are they qualified to do so? Since there are no mandatory licensing or certifications to become a professional organizer, how do you know who to choose? How do you know who is who, and what is what in the professional decluttering arena? It is simple. 

Managing and pushing a clutter-free life is a big business. Whether the "professional" organizers are in Orange County or Colorado, Nebraska, or Florida, professional organizers have multiplied by the thousands in every city and state. Everyone and their mother is calling themselves a professional organizer. Don't fret; there is a way to get some help, confidently, and without reserve.

Suppose you are one of the many that still have not gotten uber-organized. How do you pick an honest, dependable, knowledgeable, and experienced professional person to organize, declutter, and figure out your space? The answer is easy, use your gut instincts first, do an internet check for reviews, interview, and look at the person's credentials. There is a subjective and objective way to look for the perfect home and business organizer.

A real professional organizer will have clear and concise criteria for what to keep in your life. A beneficial book, and possibly a book that will help you "do-it-yourself," called The Clutter Remedy: A Guide To Getting Organized For Those Who Love Their Stuff, will be a starting point for your reference of how to organize optimally and professionally. The book, by former social worker/psychotherapist Marla Stone, describes the best way to organize your life, stuff, and space. The Clutter Remedy strategy all happens in a short period, and you learn how to stay organized, long-term. The criteria Stone developed create a seamless, effortless way to choose what to keep in your life and what to toss, without regrets or angst.

The Clutter Remedy book talks about using criteria to choose what to keep and gives a precise reason for how clutter begins and how to end all the clutter cycles. So, in essence, you stop the human in the hamster wheel syndrome: going from clearing and putting everything away to ultimately going back to clutter. 

When deciding to go with someone calling themselves a "professional" organizer, meet with them before hiring and get a sense of their personality. You want to hire someone you feel comfortable working with, whatever their expertise. 

To me, the most important traits to look for in a professional organizer are:

Kindness
Empathy
A non-judgmental attitude
Good communication skills
A positive demeanor
Goal-oriented

You want someone flexible, creative, and adaptable, especially when there are more severe over-collecting and over-accumulation challenges.

When you finally have picked the correct person to work with, make a plan, select a date, and buy supplies that will contain your things to create ample space. Next, get your yoga wear on, hydrate, and get to work, or at least be prepared to work side by side with the professional you choose.

Also, I highly recommend before starting the project that you read or listen to The Clutter Remedy: A Guide To Getting Organized For Those Who Love Their Stuff. It is a fast read and will tell you how organizing is supposed to be accomplished for a quick and long-term solution to clutter.

Marla Stone, MSW, Professional Organizer is located in Orange County, Ca
www.i-deal-lifestyle.com

Why are there so many serial daters, divorces, parent/child episodes, and relationship drama resulting in less than satisfactory bonds? One reason is psychology secrets. Therapists and diagnosticians don't always tell you what is truly wrong with you. Also, the lack of accurate dual diagnosis diagnosticians in the mental health field leaves one patched up and not fixed for good. Understanding your personality disorder challenges is essential to understanding how to declutter your relationship strategies. Next is the use of impeding and non-assertive language, and not acknowledging, naming, and sharing feelings, and the lack of focus on an ideal lifestyle, and rather living a mundane one.
 
Improving relationships is an essential and healthy aspect of having a closer bond with yourself and other people. Relationship remedies created by Marla Stone, MSW provide a fresh perspective on improving relationships, leading to a more fulfilled life. The strategy's Stone has created focuses on all kinds of associations, such as the relationship with yourself, your partner, parent-child, friends, family, and business associates. Stone's background as a former psychoanalyst, home, business, and life organizer has given her experience in different mental and personality health challenges and how those can affect relationships and resolve them. Her relationship building programs draws from her broad knowledge of human interpersonal challenges and emotional blocks, Stone's creation of life and relationship remedies, and discusses how best to handle every relationship type and situation.
 
Stone's technique of having a "good picker" simplifies identifying which relationships are worth pursuing and which ones you want to keep at a distance. The most robust relationships always start with oneself, understanding and knowing what you truly value in life, what makes you happy, self-care, being organized, good communication skills with yourself and others, and a healthy belief system. Understanding oneself leads to a better understanding of any personal challenges that may disturb relationship processes with others. Having a "good picker" also depends on having criteria for ideal relationships. Picking the correct family, friends, and peers to engage is manageable for a peaceful and rejuvenating experience rather than laced with drama and chaos. Choosing people to associate with based on your understanding of their strengths and personal challenges is optimal for easy-going and helpful relationships.

Improving parent-child relationships is about having guidelines, responsibilities, and consequences for your children. It is optimal to establish healthy boundaries, follow-through, attentive to their dreams and goals. Allowing your children to know their self-worth and helping them hold the importance of criteria for the relationships they have is important for their well-being and autonomy. Improving your relationship with family and friends depends on having a standard for what you want in that relationship. Business relationships are similar to that of relationships with your children. Having a better relationship with your boss, coworkers, or employees requires boundaries, rules, consequences, communication, shared feelings, and validation. 
 
Mental and personality health challenges affect relationships and life itself. When not addressed with an understanding of the interpersonal dynamics, it will cause tremendous weariness and dissatisfaction. These prickly and unpleasant health disturbances will get in the way of productivity, intimacy, interactions with others, and dreams and goals.  Mental health and personality unruliness can be overlooked and not addressed, leaving unhealthy behavioral patterns to play out, causing upset and havoc in most situations. However, we often find ourselves faced with people of particular personality challenges that disrupt our life, happiness, and goals. To understand these obstacles, Stone has created fourteen different interpersonal challenges and how they will impact individuals, families, and businesses. She then explains how to help people heal these maladaptive aberrations that disturb their relationships with others and severely damage a chance of living a fulfilled life. Stone has developed a test through her business I-Deal-Lifestyle Inc. that is a highly accurate check of the  fragments of mental and personality challenges within the psyche, which will create maladaptive behavior patterns throughout life when not addressed. Once a person understands what innate personal challenges are causing them the most difficulty, they will learn how to replace them with healthier traits and see themselves clearly, while connecting to their inner voice, dreams, and goals.
 
The fourteen personal challenges Stone has identified are: boundary, rebellious, unbalanced, motivation, ego, obsessive, fear, memory, addiction, nervous, attention-seeking, dependency, rigid, and detached.  Stone has posed difficult personality blocks into commonplace non-threatening, and defined challenges. With some intervention, strategy, and desire to heal, any person disturbed by negative interpersonal health aspects can become a healthy life/relationship participant. The solutions for having a healthy, well-rounded character are simple, and a person can take a turn for the better quickly, efficiently, and with confidence.

​For more information visit www.i-deal-lifestyle.com
 

Top 10 Tips For Decluttering Your Home During Lockdown
Living in a lockdown situation will be unnerving. It will create some situational depression for many of you. Learning and utilizing coping strategies that work will make life, work and interaction with family and friends much easier. Understanding the idea that within your self you are truly free to remain creative, organized and focused is the most important factor to not feeling, “locked down.” There are many ways to stay free of depression symptoms, and remain driven and focused in the now and in your future endeavors. It is as simple as "willing" yourself to do the things you love to do, despite a government order to stay inside. "In my soul I am free" is the mantra to adopt in order to remain autonomous and connected into something much bigger than the world at large.

​Here are 10 Top Coping Strategies During Difficult Times
1.    Write a new goals list, even if you think you have one. Include every single thing that you want to do in life within the next three to five years. Go Big, Fairy Godmother Big!
2.    After writing your lofty goals, write three specific ways you will fulfill those goals.  For instance if you said build a new business, three specific ways to achieve them would be:

1. Write a business plan
2. Write a policy and procedures manual
3. Figure out the name of the business and buy domain and business license. 

3.    Next, write a criteria list for what kind of friends you want in your life. Write 30 things that you want in ideal friends. Go Big, Fairy Godmother Big! It is important to have supportive and loving friends in your life. Make sure you ask for unconditional love and regard from those friends during difficult times. Now is a great time to focus on developing healthy, and stabile support systems.
4.    Write 30 things you want in an ideal partner. Go Big, Go Fairy Godmother Big! Whether you are in a relationship or not, this is the time to evaluate your partner relationship. Settling for a so, so partner is not ideal. Understanding what you truly want in a partner takes some thought and insight. You owe your current partner and future partners the fact that YOU are clear on what you want in an ideal partner. Nobody is good at guessing what someone else wants out of life.
5.    Clear out any emotional clutter that is stirring around inside of you. Any past traumas, or unresolved negative aspects of yourself lead to cluttered decisions and difficult paths in life. Take the time to write a list of all the things in your life that hurt or wounded you. Then, use The Clearing and Healing™ techniques discussed in The Clutter Remedy: A Guide To Getting Organized For Those Who Love Their Stuff by Marla Stone, MSW. The strategy to heal and clear out those old “cobwebs,” is worth your time.
6.    Declutter any cluttered and sloppy spaces you have in your residence or business offices. Figure out storage solutions that will keep your space looking like a “model home,” or an "ideal" corporate executive space. Living, and working in a clear and uncluttered space lends to the creative processes you want to engage in, while in lock down mode. Read Chapter Three of The Clutter Remedy https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-clutter-remedy-marla-stone/1130791302 to gather ideas on how to get your space looking like something out of a magazine.

7.    Gain clarity on what makes you happy. Are you doing things in life that create drudgery? Are you a good delegator when it comes to off-shooting tasks that can be done by others, more capable and or willing? Are you noticing when you are in a rut, and don’t know how to stop the human-in-the-hamster-wheel affect? Recognizing that authentic happiness comes from having a vision of  what will make you happy makes the wheel go 'round faster and smoother. Figure out how to have the following things happen for you in life:
A.    An engagement in self exploration. 
B.    An ideal intimate relationship
C.    Ideal friends and social network
D.    An understanding of your purpose in the world. Why are you here? What are your spiritual beliefs? 
E.     Accepting yourself as healthy, happy and settled, no matter what state you are in.

8.    Love yourself. This is an old adage, but love yourself, and if you don’t, figure out why, and fix the things about yourself that you find unloveable. Do some digging around in uncomfortable memories or thoughts and get some outside help when you hit a wall.
9.    Get physically healthier, happier and have more fun. Working on youself with a concerted effort is your responsibility. It is not an overnight phenomenon. Stop blaming others for your own lack of self improvement. Nothing changes unless something changes.
10.    Plan places to travel to once lockdown is over, or find out where you can travel to during lockdown, safely. Traveling gives you a different 360 viewpoint of why you’re doing all the other things to improve your life. Traveling is relaxing and inspiring. Going on vacation is as important as all of the above. It is within the reprieve of taking time off that you will notice what you truly want to do with your life with objectivity and a full sense of freedom.


Marla Stone, MSW is the Declutter Your Strategy™ Expert  www.i-deal-lifestyle.com